My only child, my son, just graduated college and took a great job. What does that mean? Well, that's what I've been wondering for the past 2 years. I left home when I was 17, had my son when I was 19, left his father when I was 20, then raised my son by myself for the next 18 years. I've never been close to my parents, had no brothers and sisters, so my whole life and identity has been defined by his existence. I've lived each day to be there for him (like my parents never were for me), provide food and shelter, teach him right from wrong, help him make decisions, etc. Well, he turned out to be one heck of a fine young man, but I noticed around 2-3 years ago that he really no longer needs me. I started wondering what exactly will I do with my life once he leaves home? I remember when I was younger, I had a thousand things I wanted to do if I only had "free time" to spare, yet now that I do, I'm no longer that person. I have no desire to do any of the things I once thought about. I've started asking myself, who, exactly, am I? And the answer always come back - "I have NO IDEA!" HAHA! I haven't had a life to myself since I was 18 years old, and now that my life has been given back to me, I don't know who the hell I am! This is troubling indeed.....so I suppose I must go on that journey that people always talk about and "FIND MYSELF!" Who knows what will happen...maybe I'll run for president or maybe I'll wind up in the funny papers....

Bookmark: